Friday, May 2, 2014

Ode to Pinterest

dear pinterest 
Dear Pinterest,

You are your own worst enemy.  Instead of tackling any number of the ridiculous pins that I have pinned since I enthusiastically become a member of the Pinterest community on November 29, 2011, I stay on Pinterest and just add to the ever growing list of DIY that I will never actually Do Myself.

12 boards, 564* pins, and the only creative thing I’ve done from my “I need time to get creative” board involved hanging up an empty tea tin on my fridge with magnets.  Which, if you exclude the time it took to drink the tea, required all of about 37 seconds.  And the truth is, I don’t need the time to get creative, I need the willpower to stop watching Rules of Engagement on Netflix.

Just how far down this rabbit hole are we?  Some simple math and we arrive at:
  • 103 DIY pins (split between 2 boards), TWO of which I have accomplished 
  • A whopping 299 pins of recipes, of which 5 have actually been made and eaten
  • 21 pins of things I basically just need an excuse to buy (Harry Potter Monopoly, I’m looking at you)
  • 14 pins of things I want to read (do you see where my priorities lie…?)
And that’s just my public boards with double digit pins.  My secret wedding Pinterest board? 238 pins.  I didn’t even have 238 details in the wedding.  And, loathe as I am to admit it now, I was that bride-to-be that said “How did people get married before Pinterest?” We used maybe 12 of the pins for the actual day.  (Best Pinterest Wedding Idea? Sparklers shot.  Followed closely by, blue and green tissue paper puff balls).

My pin-to-do ratio is incredibly small. In fact, not even my boards are redeeming.  I don’t have a secret Pinterest board of gifts I’m planning on eventually buying the people I love.  Or one where I pin volunteer opportunities.  Instead, I have a whole separate board for “Wedding Photo Inspiration” (47 pins) and one for “Honeymoon Activities” (7 pins).

Basically, what I am trying to tell you, Pinterest, is that a stronger woman would have given you up for Lent.  A stronger woman would realize Pinterest is not a hobby.  Sewing is a hobby, cooking is a hobby – Pinterest is simply supposed to be a tool, a means to the end.  And yet, I sit here with my glass of wine, feet curled beneath me, sewing machine gathering dust in the corner and I pin.  I pin.

*This number has already increased in simply writing this post.  Seriously, I went on Pinterest to research actual numbers and, well, you know.  Basically, my pin count is the national debt.

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